The Codependent: On Love and Marriage

Kim discusses The Codependent View on Life

Kim Cooper

Do you expect your partner to care for your emotions by ‘cheering you up’ every time you are sad? Or perhaps you think love is them knowing how to ‘keep you happy’ when you are angry or in a bad mood? If so this misunderstanding of what emotions are and how they work may be creating more resentment than love.”

Kim's Steps to a Better Marriage

Free Introductory Tutorial

100% Privacy - The tutorial will open on this page.

Includes the free video, “3 Habits that Destroy Love”

Long term research done over 30 years at Stanford University has demonstrated the importance of learning to regulate our own emotions (calm ourselves down after we have become emotional) if we want to lead a successful life that attracts love and respect. But this kind of emotional maturity is difficult to learn if we had emotionally immature role models growing up. Being raised by emotionally needy parents may have also taught you some unhealthy ideas about happiness and personal goals . . .

Signs Of Your Codependence In Marriage: Sad Woman Praying For Help.

Signs You May be Codependent . . .

If someone in your family is upset with you (or in a bad mood), do you find it difficult to stay focused on your own life and goals? . . .  Read More

As a child were you expected to keep one or both of your parents happy, despite them being needy and demanding (and at times quite a handful for even an adult to manage)?  Were either of your parents irresponsible, childish, an alcoholic, gambler, unfaithful, abusive or have other problems that no one discussed?

You may have been made to feel special for taking care of one or both of your parents (and were perhaps treated more like an adult than a child), but was this at the expense of your own emotional development and needs?

This role may have won you special favour, but probably felt very uncomfortable. A child’s needs and personality have little room for expression or growth in this kind of parent/child relationship.

A child growing up in this environment will end up with some unhealthy ideas about what level of emotional care-taking is normal & healthy for an adult to expect.

How a Codependent Becomes an Emotional Manipulator

Coming to believe a person needs other people to manage their negative emotions, is a fallacy which can cause a person to develop codependent patterns of behaviour growing up.

This erroneous thinking can lead you to also believing that people are bad if they do not respond to your negative emotions in a particular way.

Codependent thinking may also lead to psychosomatic illness and emotions being used as a means of trying to attract love and care.

I used to be guilty of this kind of emotional manipulation. It took me a long time to see that my codependency was destroying my marriage, making me unattractive and ruining my life. If you would like to learn to overcome these negative patterns, I hope you will sign up for my free introductory tutorial today . . .

Kim's Steps to a Better Marriage

Free Introductory Tutorial

100% Privacy - The tutorial will open on this page.

Includes the free video, “3 Habits that Destroy Love”

Signs of Codependency in Your Marriage

Codependency In Your Marriage: Drowning Hand Waving For Help In In Heart

Are You Married to a Codependent?

Does your partner always want to talk about your relationship when you would rather be doing something else? . . . Read More

Continue Reading . . . Relationship Recovery

Codependency Self Help . . .